Hey Peter you're not actually on the team!
Is it just me or is every person named Pete or Peter a loud mouth? I have worked with 3 guys named Peter and every one of them is loud as hell. The last Pete I worked with talked so loud on the phone you could hear everything he said, fights with his wife, how his vacation was, and the status of his fantasy football team.(if you know anyone that plays fantasy football, you know it's not a fantasy to them, this shit is real) All topics I could care less about.
To make matters worse they are always in management. So loud mouth phone Pete goes off all day on the phone about his stupid vacation or fantasy football. I used to sit in the cube right next to him so of course I get to hear every word over/through the wall. Then you have 8 ass kissers that work for Pete walking over throughout the day asking about his vacation. So I get to hear about Pete's vacation 10 times a day for an entire week. Then every Monday I get to hear about his stupid fantasy football team, how they did and whatever rank he is in now that his awesome QB scored so many points or whatever. If I ever needed to ask Pete a question I walked around the wall and asked him, after answering he would usually say, “Did you hear about my fantasy football team?” Since I didn’t want to limit my career, because Pete was management, I would usually say, “No” and then I would listen to the same spiel for the 20th time that day. I seriously could finish his sentences but I would have to act shocked and surprised when I heard the highlights of his stories. I usually walked back to my desk feeling like a total tool after a conversation with Pete.
When I left that company I was so happy that I didn't have to hear loud mouth Pete anymore. Well now I work with a new guy named Peter, he is in management, loves every sport there is to love, and is loud as hell! The first few months weren't bad because he never came around my cube but now he has found a new friend that sits right next to me. Every morning while I am trying to drink my coffee and wake up I get to hear topics like this at 80 decibels, "A-rod crushed the ball and won the game for us.", "Wakefield sucks and can't pitch against us", "We killed them, I think we have a shot at going all the way this year." I don't understand why they always refer to "we" or "us" when talking about teams that are located halfway across the country. I think it's a sad false reality they have created for themselves, I bet they still throw paper in the trash can from 15 feet away and say shit like, "Pete for 2!......it's good!!" But before I make assumptions I better find out if they actually play on these teams.
I talked to Peter and verified that he doesn't play for a professional sports team. Dang! I really wanted his autograph. I then asked if he used to play for a college team, you can never get a straight yes or no answer with that question. You will usually get some lame excuse like they got married or they didn't want to play college ball or some stupid ass reason why they were a superstar but things just didn't work out. It's always the guys that suck the most that are die hard sports fans. It's like they want to be good at sports so bad so they think if they know a lot and talk a lot about sports then people will think they're good.
I just want them to shut up about it, just watch the game and shut up. Blog about it, email about it. Play basketball by yourself in the driveway, whatever. Just don't come over here and stand by my cube for 30 mins at 7:30 in the morning and start yapping about some random shit nobody cares about. The guy he is talks to doesn't even care, this is how the typical conversation will go:
Loud mouth Pete: Did you see the game last night?
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: What game?
Loud mouth Pete: The Yankee game
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: no
Loud mouth Pete: Dude we kicked ass
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: A-rod and Johnson (insert random sports crap here)
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: Then (some Yankee player) hit a home run!
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: Yeah, it was a good game but we killed them.
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: cool
After Pete sort of gets the hint that the other guy really doesn't care you will hear this, "Hey Mike, did you catch the game last night" as he is running over to him.
If your name is Pete or Peter and your in management and a crazy sports fan. I just have a few words for you.....SHUT UP!!!
Tyse
To make matters worse they are always in management. So loud mouth phone Pete goes off all day on the phone about his stupid vacation or fantasy football. I used to sit in the cube right next to him so of course I get to hear every word over/through the wall. Then you have 8 ass kissers that work for Pete walking over throughout the day asking about his vacation. So I get to hear about Pete's vacation 10 times a day for an entire week. Then every Monday I get to hear about his stupid fantasy football team, how they did and whatever rank he is in now that his awesome QB scored so many points or whatever. If I ever needed to ask Pete a question I walked around the wall and asked him, after answering he would usually say, “Did you hear about my fantasy football team?” Since I didn’t want to limit my career, because Pete was management, I would usually say, “No” and then I would listen to the same spiel for the 20th time that day. I seriously could finish his sentences but I would have to act shocked and surprised when I heard the highlights of his stories. I usually walked back to my desk feeling like a total tool after a conversation with Pete.
When I left that company I was so happy that I didn't have to hear loud mouth Pete anymore. Well now I work with a new guy named Peter, he is in management, loves every sport there is to love, and is loud as hell! The first few months weren't bad because he never came around my cube but now he has found a new friend that sits right next to me. Every morning while I am trying to drink my coffee and wake up I get to hear topics like this at 80 decibels, "A-rod crushed the ball and won the game for us.", "Wakefield sucks and can't pitch against us", "We killed them, I think we have a shot at going all the way this year." I don't understand why they always refer to "we" or "us" when talking about teams that are located halfway across the country. I think it's a sad false reality they have created for themselves, I bet they still throw paper in the trash can from 15 feet away and say shit like, "Pete for 2!......it's good!!" But before I make assumptions I better find out if they actually play on these teams.
I talked to Peter and verified that he doesn't play for a professional sports team. Dang! I really wanted his autograph. I then asked if he used to play for a college team, you can never get a straight yes or no answer with that question. You will usually get some lame excuse like they got married or they didn't want to play college ball or some stupid ass reason why they were a superstar but things just didn't work out. It's always the guys that suck the most that are die hard sports fans. It's like they want to be good at sports so bad so they think if they know a lot and talk a lot about sports then people will think they're good.
I just want them to shut up about it, just watch the game and shut up. Blog about it, email about it. Play basketball by yourself in the driveway, whatever. Just don't come over here and stand by my cube for 30 mins at 7:30 in the morning and start yapping about some random shit nobody cares about. The guy he is talks to doesn't even care, this is how the typical conversation will go:
Loud mouth Pete: Did you see the game last night?
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: What game?
Loud mouth Pete: The Yankee game
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: no
Loud mouth Pete: Dude we kicked ass
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: A-rod and Johnson (insert random sports crap here)
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: Then (some Yankee player) hit a home run!
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: oh cool
Loud mouth Pete: Yeah, it was a good game but we killed them.
Guy that can't tell Pete to shut up: cool
After Pete sort of gets the hint that the other guy really doesn't care you will hear this, "Hey Mike, did you catch the game last night" as he is running over to him.
If your name is Pete or Peter and your in management and a crazy sports fan. I just have a few words for you.....SHUT UP!!!
Tyse
posted by tyse at
9:03 AM
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